Sunday, August 08, 2004

They're Coming for Your Children...

Here's the catalog copy for a new children's book entitled Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed, by Katharine DeBrecht:


The story of two boys who dream about opening a lemonade stand when a strange thing happens...

Their dream gets stuck in Liberaland!

“Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed! A Small Lesson in Conservatism” is a wonderful way to teach young children the valuable lessons of conservatism. In simple text, parents and children follow Tommy and Lou on their quest to earn money for a swing set their parents cannot afford. As their dream gets stuck in Liberaland, Tommy and Lou’s lemonade stand is hit with many obstacles.

Liberals keep appearing from behind their lemon tree, taking half of their money in taxes, forbidding them to hang a picture of Jesus atop their stand, and making them give broccoli with each glass sold.

Law after law instituted by the press-hungry liberals finally results in the liberals taking over Tommy and Lou’s stand and offering sour lemonade at astronomical prices to the customers.


Lovely.

2 Comments:

At 7:13 AM, Blogger John Wendt said...

What we need is a book in which a mega-mart goes into the lemonade business, undercutting Tommy and Lou by pricing their lemonade below cost, and using inferior ingredients, with contaminated water. It tastes the same, but it causes cancer in about 1 out of 10,000 people. Anyway, nobody can get to Tommy and Lou's house to buy their lemonade, because the street is crumbling because nobody pays taxes anymore, so there is no money for maintenance. When Tommy and Lou go out of business, the mega-mart commences to offer sour lemonade at astronomical prices, because there is no longer any competition.

And for conservatives reading this, aren't you just a little bit ashamed of the distortions? Nobody is telling a private business to remove religious symbols. Customers are free to patronize religious businesses or not. The problem comes with religion in government offices, which are supposed to represent everybody, Christian or not.

BTW, why can't Tommy and Lou's parents afford the swing set? Was it because their father's job was outsourced to China?

 
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